Dear Aiden,
Hopefully you'll get out of work with plenty of time to avoid the traffic. I
know how you get when work sits on your desk but I think you can take this
one week off. By the time you get here, I will have set up the cottage. I
couldn't stand being in that house alone. I'm so used to hearing Demetrius
playing his music or messing around with his guitar. The silence drove me
insane. Call me before you leave, in case we need anything and so I know
you actually left. I still remember the last time you said you would join
us in the Cape. You called me around 11 PM saying you wouldn't make it
until the next day because you were held up at work.
When you reach the Martha's Vineyard, follow State Road until you get to
Edgartown Road, and make a right. Remember our first vacation when
Demetrius was only 10? He looked so cute in those swim trunks you bought
for him. Back then I wasn't sure if you were trying to bribe my affections
but now I know you wanted Demetrius to like you. He loved those trunks. He
wore them so much they practically fell off of him. I think that was the
last time we vacationed as a family. I'm not counting our honeymoon of
course, but even that was only for a weekend. It came and went in a blink.
Then follow Edgartown Road until you reach Cook Road and make a left. Cook
Road is the place, when Demetrius was a child, he ran into the street,
naked, his arms open to the world. His laughter filled the air. That day
was so hot, everyone wore the bare minimum. I swear I chased him for blocks
before I caught the little bugger. Demetrius doesn't laugh like that
anymore. He's too cool for that, or so he says. I should have known he'd
have no problem leaving the first chance he got.
Then you'll follow Cook Road and pass Hinckley Circle and Davis Street and
Causeway Road. So many points to pass. Seems like the same points in our
lives. I can't believe we've been together for more than ten years. I
thought we would have more to share. I guess you were too busy at work or
wherever you claimed to be. For the longest time I thought you were having
an affair. I even followed you around one day. Maybe I could handle
another woman more than I can handle you not wanting to be around.
Cook will turn into Skiff Avenue. Skiff Avenue will dead end. Like our
marriage hit some kind of skiff. It seemed so perfect the first time we
came here. You fit in so well with me and my Demetrius. He played on the
sand until he was tired. We roasted marshmallows on the bonfire. Remember
those potatoes we dug underneath the fire and pulled them steaming hot out
of the ground? My body nestled between your legs, my back to your sweatered
chest, my head resting against you as we watched the sun go down. We simply
were.
At the dead end make a right and pass Burts Way. I hope we make this turn.
You and I. I have already called Demetrius five times to check on him. See
if he needs anything. He always says, "No mom, I'm fine. Don't worry." But
of course I worry. What does he expect me to do? I almost flew to Florida
to see him. Aiden, you know if you don't show up, that's what I'm going to
do. I'm getting on the first flight I can to check on him. He needs his
mama whether he knows it or not.
Follow the curve and pass Mariel Way. I know what I must sound like. I
must sound like some crazy mother whose spent her life living through her
son. Well, that may be true. It may be. Aiden, you need to talk to me.
You need to take yourself away from that damn office and say more than hello
and goodbye to me.
The road becomes Hines Point. And what have we become? Strangers? We have,
haven't we? We are strangers who live in the same house under the same roof
and for some reason we have learned to tolerate each other's existence. And
now the one person who has filled my void is gone.
The cottage is the last one on your right. I know the quiet that was in the
house will follow me to this place. No matter how much noise I make that
damn silence looms underneath. It spreads. By the time you get here, I will
have cleaned the house twenty times, grocery shopped, called my son a
hundred more times and cursed the girlfriend he thinks is so great;
wonderful enough to follow to Florida.
You know he made a mistake don't you? I knew it the moment I laid eyes on
that bitch. I tried to tell him but of course he came back with a
scholarship to Florida State, so what was I supposed to say? You wouldn't
even interject. You didn't say a word when he made the "announcement" that
he was going so far away. It's as if you didn't care. The number is 9
Hines Point Road, Vineyard Haven, MA. I'll have a glass of Malbec waiting
for you, even if I'm gone.
Margaret
